Because I Was a Girl Read online

  •    NANCY PELOSI BECOMES THE FIRST FEMALE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, SONIA SOTOMAYOR IS CONFIRMED AS A SUPREME COURT JUSTICE, CONDOLEEZZA RICE SERVES AS THE FIRST FEMALE AFRICAN-AMERICAN SECRETARY OF STATE, AND ANN DUNWOODY BECOMES THE FIRST FEMALE FOUR-STAR GENERAL IN THE US MILITARY.

  •    AFTER A 56-YEAR-LONG ROMANCE, DEL MARTIN AND PHYLLIS LYON WED EACH OTHER AS THE FIRST SAME-SEX COUPLE TO BE LEGALLY MARRIED IN THE UNITED STATES.

  •    THE LILLY LEDBETTER FAIR PAY ACT, THE FIRST BILL SIGNED INTO LAW BY PRESIDENT OBAMA, RESTORES FEDERAL PROTECTION AGAINST PAY DISCRIMINATION BASED ON GENDER.

  ACADEMY AWARD-NOMINATED ACTOR AND CHILDREN’S BOOK WRITER

  Photo credit: George Kuchler / GKPhotography.com

  QUVENZHANÉ WALLIS

  No one has ever told me I couldn’t do something because I was a girl. I never really thought about sexism until I was older and learned that women get paid less than men for the same job, which is terrible. It’s never happened to me, and I hope it never does. A lot of women from the past have fought and fought to make it possible for girls like me to do whatever we want. I go to an all-girls school, so the viewpoint and attitude that boys are better than girls don’t exist at my school. I would say we’re told the exact opposite. We’re taught girls can do anything!

  My parents also never said stuff like “Don’t throw like a girl” to me. They always say, “Just do your best, and whatever happens, happens.”

  I want girls to know that it doesn’t matter that you are a girl or how old you are. If it is something you like and dream of doing, just go for it, just do it! Your age, your gender—they don’t matter. I wanted to be an actress since I was little, and I went after my dream. For my first movie role, I was nominated for an Academy Award. Since then, I’ve worked for a lot of great directors and starred alongside amazing actors. Years ago, I told my parents that I like writing and wanted to write books and scripts; now I have four books coming out. And I’m not done dreaming yet—when I grow up, I’d also like to be a veterinarian or a doctor.

  * * *

  I WANT GIRLS TO KNOW THAT IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT YOU ARE A GIRL OR HOW OLD YOU ARE. IF IT IS SOMETHING YOU LIKE AND DREAM OF DOING, JUST GO FOR IT, JUST DO IT! YOUR AGE, YOUR GENDER—THEY DON'T MATTER.

  * * *

  STUDENT AND TRANSGENDER ACTIVIST

  Photo credit: Ron Murray / ImageActive.com

  ZOEY LUNA

  High school has been much harder than I expected.

  I entered high school wide-eyed and excited. I was feeling really good about myself at the time. After years of struggling to love myself, I had finally started being me and understanding who I was. I had navigated my transition in fifth grade. I had made all sorts of great friends, many of whom are still my friends today. They were going to the same high school I was, so it was basically middle school 2.0, but with new people. And I was looking forward to making even more new friends and getting a boyfriend. I was ready.

  But I wasn’t prepared for all the people who had it out for me because I am transgender. Immediately, I became known as “the trans girl.” I didn’t understand why I could only be the trans girl and not just Zoey. I know I’m transgender, but why does that have to be my only label? I started to blame myself, thinking that I was doing something wrong if people could see me only as transgender. What about all the other things that make me me?

  Finding a boyfriend was proving really tough, too. I had been talking to some boys, and every time they would say things like “Let’s keep things private” or “Let’s be low-key.” And I’d ask why, but I knew why.

  One guy actually had the “kindness” to tell me point blank (via text): “Since you’re transgender I don’t want to be seen with you in public. Let’s just chill at your place? Btw you’re so pretty!”

  I grew to hate myself again, as I did before I transitioned. No guys wanted to be seen with me in public because I’m transgender, my art wasn’t taken seriously because I was transgender, I wasn’t taken seriously as a human because I was transgender.

  I made an effort to just fade away, which, if you know me, does NOT suit my personality. I explored myself through others. I made friends with about every clique in the school. The artsy kids, entitled upperclassmen, potheads, basketball girls, the Goth kids. I adjusted my personality to fit in with them—I just wanted to belong to something. But I found myself feeling even more lonely and lost. (I even cut my fringe just because I wanted to be known for something other than being transgender. The bangs were cute, but they didn’t have the desired long-term effect.)

  Time passed; I can’t even tell you how much, because when you feel the heaviness of being lonely pushing you down, you lose track of, well, everything. But one day, something just clicked: Why do I have to let other people define me? Why do I have to feel sad just because others don’t get me? I couldn’t make a spot for myself in a group if I wasn’t being myself. It was as if I had snapped out of a horrible dream. Suddenly, it all seemed so obvious. I finally understood that being transgender isn’t a bad thing just because of what some generic boys or superficial kids thought. If people are going to associate me as only being transgender, so be it, because I know I’m much more than that. Being transgender is just a part of who I am. I’m also an actor and an artist. I’m warm and pretty. I’m a good friend and daughter. I care about people.

  * * *

  BUT ONE DAY, SOMETHING JUST CLICKED: WHY DO I HAVE TO LET OTHER PEOPLE DEFINE ME? WHY DO I HAVE TO FEEL SAD JUST BECAUSE OTHERS DON'T GET ME?

  I'M MAKING IT MY MISSION TO STOP LABELING PEOPLE BASED ON WHAT'S ON THE OUTSIDE, TO STOP ASSUMING THINGS ABOUT THEM BECAUSE OF HOW THEY LOOK OR TALK.

  * * *

  It sucks to be put in a box by society, be it for your gender expression, color, ethnicity, style, voice, hair, decisions, or literally anything. I’m guilty of doing it, too. But I’m making it my mission to stop labeling people based on what’s on the outside, to stop assuming things about them because of how they look or talk. We all have many different layers.

  I have a few years left of high school, and yet I’ve already wised up so much. I’m confident in ways that I’ve never been before—back and better than ever. And the best part is, if I can shake off the weight of a thousand underhanded comments about my identity, I know I can handle anything.

  STUDENT

  Photo credit: Cathryn Farnsworth

  MATTIE JOHNSTON

  As told to Melissa de la Cruz

  I told my mom I couldn’t participate in this book because no one has ever told me I couldn’t do anything because I was a girl. That’s just silly!

  When we saw Hamilton in New York, I told my mom that it should have been called “Eliza,” because if it weren’t for her, we wouldn’t know Alexander Hamilton’s story—she was the real hero of the play.

  I really like Stranger Things because Eleven, the girl, is the most powerful. Every year for Comic-Con in San Diego, I dress up as an evil girl supervillain. I’d be happy to dress up as a superhero, but there aren’t enough girl superheroes with cool costumes. I’ve gone as Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy. This year, I might go as Laura and Dad is going as Logan, aka Wolverine and his daughter.

  The other week, the boys banned me from their clan on Clash Royale because I was a better player than they were, but I demanded that they reinstate me, and they did.

  * * *

  EVERY YEAR FOR COMIC-CON IN SAN DIEGO, I DRESS UP AS AN EVIL GIRL SUPERVILLAIN. I'D BE HAPPY TO DRESS UP AS A SUPERHERO, BUT THERE AREN'T ENOUGH GIRL SUPERHEROES WITH COOL COSTUMES.

  * * *

  Oh, I just remembered when I was in preschool, a few boys said I couldn’t open the pen cap, which was glued to the pen, because I was a girl. So I said I’ll show them! And I grabbed the pen. But I couldn’t open it! Then the boys tried, and none of them could open it, either. We all laughed.

  THE 2010s

  •    THE US WOMEN’S NATIONAL TEAM DEFEATS JAPAN TO WIN
THE FIFA WOMEN’S WORLD CUP, BREAKING THE RECORD FOR THE MOST-WATCHED SOCCER GAME IN US TELEVISION HISTORY.

  •    ASHLEY GRAHAM, AN ADVOCATE FOR BODY POSITIVITY AND PLUS-SIZE MODEL, APPEARS ON THE COVER OF SPORTS ILLUSTRATED’S FAMOUS SWIMSUIT ISSUE.

  •    THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD MO’NE DAVIS IS THE FIRST GIRL TO PITCH A SHUTOUT IN LITTLE LEAGUE POSTSEASON HISTORY.

  •    IN PROTEST OF WHAT SHE SAW AS AN UNACCEPTABLE RESPONSE BY SCHOOL ADMINISTRATION TO HER ALLEGATION OF SEXUAL ASSAULT, STUDENT AND PERFORMANCE ARTIST EMMA SULKOWICZ CARRIES HER MATTRESS ACROSS COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY FOR NINE MONTHS, INSPIRING A NATIONAL CONVERSATION ABOUT SEXUAL ASSAULT ON COLLEGE CAMPUSES.

  •    THE PENTAGON OPENS ALL COMBAT JOBS IN THE MILITARY TO WOMEN.

  •    WOMEN’S MARCHES TAKE PLACE ACROSS THE GLOBE IN SUPPORT OF EQUALITY, DIVERSITY, INCLUSION, AND THE PROMOTION OF WOMEN’S RIGHTS AS HUMAN RIGHTS.

  •    A RRECORD-BREAKING 104 WOMEN SERVE IN THE 114TH CONGRESS, THOUGH MAKING UP ONLY ABOUT 20 PERCENT OF THE SENATE AND HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES.

  •    KATHRYN BIGELOW BECOMES THE FIRST WOMAN (AND ONLY WOMAN TO DATE) TO WIN AN ACADEMY AWARD FOR BEST DIRECTOR.

  •    CONGRESS REAUTHORIZES THE VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN ACT TO REDUCE DOMESTIC AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE AND TO EXPLICITLY EXTEND FEDERAL PROTECTION AND ACCESS TO SERVICES TO WOMEN OF ALL RACES, ETHNICITIES, COUNTRIES OF ORIGIN, SEXUAL ORIENTATION, AND TRIBAL AFFILIATION.

  •    HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON RUNS FOR ELECTION AS THE FIRST WOMAN ON A MAJOR PARTY TICKET TO RECEIVE THE NOMINATION FOR PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.

  •    GYMNAST GABBY DOUGLAS WINS THE INDIVIDUAL ALL-AROUND AND TEAM COMPETITIONS AT THE 2012 LONDON OLYMPICS AND BECOMES THE FIRST AFRICAN-AMERICAN INDIVIDUAL ALL-AROUND CHAMPION. SIMONE BILES REPEATS THE FEAT IN THE 2016 RIO DE JANEIRO OLYMPIC GAMES, ULTIMATELY TAKING HOME ONE BRONZE AND FOUR GOLD MEDALS.

  •    THE 2016 RIO OLYMPICS MARKS A NUMBER OF FIRSTS FOR AMERICAN WOMEN: IBTIHAJ MUHAMMAD, THE FIRST US OLYMPIAN TO COMPETE IN HIJAB, TAKES HOME THE BRONZE MEDAL IN FENCING; SIMONE MANUEL BECOMES THE FIRST BLACK WOMAN TO WIN GOLD IN AN INDIVIDUAL SWIMMING EVENT; AND SWIMMER KATIE LEDECKY SMASHES MULTIPLE WORLD RECORDS TO BECOME THE MOST DECORATED FEMALE ATHLETE OF THE 2016 OLYMPIC GAMES.

  •    THE US SUPREME COURT RULES TO LEGALIZE SAME-SEX MARRIAGES UNDER THE EQUAL PROTECTION CLAUSE OF THE US CONSTITUTION.

  •    THE #YESALLWOMEN AND #BLACKGIRLMAGIC SOCIAL MEDIA CAMPAIGNS DOMINATE TWITTER TO SPREAD AWARENESS OF VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN AND TO CELEBRATE AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN’S ACHIEVEMENTS.

  Notes

  20: REBECCA SOFFER

  1.  Name has been changed.

  2.  Name has been changed.

  CONTRIBUTORS

  ELIZABETH ACEVEDO is the youngest child and only daughter of Dominican immigrants. She holds a BA in performing arts from George Washington University and an MFA in creative writing from the University of Maryland. With over fourteen years of performance experience, Elizabeth has toured her poetry nationally and internationally. She is a National Poetry Slam champion, Cave Canem fellow, CantoMundo fellow, and participant of the Callaloo Creative Writing Workshop. She has two collections of poetry, Beastgirl & Other Origin Myths (YesYes Books, 2016) and winner of the 2016 Berkshire Prize, Medusa Reads La Negra’s Palm (Tupelo Press, forthcoming). Her biggest role models are Lucille Clifton, Sandra Cisneros, Julia Alvarez, Shirley Chisolm, Cardi B, and Serena Williams.

  KATRINA ADAMS is the chairman of the board, CEO, and president of the United States Tennis Association, a position she assumed in January 2015. Katrina is the first African-American, first former professional tennis player, and youngest person to serve as president in the organization’s 135-year history. As an accomplished tennis pro, Katrina played for twelve years on the WTA tour, ranking as high as number sixty-seven in the world in singles and number eight in doubles, winning twenty career doubles titles. Katrina attended and played her collegiate tennis at Northwestern University, helping the Wildcats to Big Ten championships in 1986 and 1987. Since 2005, Katrina has served as the executive director of the Harlem Junior Tennis and Education Program, a National Junior Tennis & Learning network chapter based in New York City. A Chicago native, Katrina currently lives in White Plains, New York.

  VICTORIA AVEYARD is an author and a screenwriter, born and raised in a small town in western Massachusetts. Both of her parents are public-school teachers, as well as avid film, television, and literature fans. Victoria grew up on a steady diet of The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Harry Potter, and Lost. She pursued a degree in writing for film and television at the University of Southern California’s School of Cinematic Arts. After graduating from college in 2012, Victoria moved home and began writing the manuscript that would become Red Queen. She has since published three number one New York Times–and USA Today–bestselling books and two New York Times–bestselling novellas, and she continues pursuing her writing career while living full time in Los Angeles, California.

  BONNIE BARTLETT is an award-winning actor of television and film. Her career spans more than sixty years, with her first major role on the 1950s daytime drama Love of Life. She has appeared in dozens of productions, notably Little House on the Prairie, St. Elsewhere (for which she won two Emmy Awards), Twins, ER, Once and Again, Parks and Recreation, and Better Call Saul. Bonnie was born in Wisconsin and grew up in Illinois. She attended Northwestern University, where she met her husband, William Daniels, also an award-winning actor. The couple live in Studio City, California.

  BRENDA BOWEN is a writer, literary agent, and former publisher. She has worked as children’s editorial director at Simon & Schuster, Scholastic, Henry Holt and Company, and Disney/Hyperion. She is a former chair of the Children’s Book Council and has served on the boards of the Association of American Publishers and the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art. Her numerous books for children include the Christopher Award–winning How Many Seeds in a Pumpkin? and Eliza: The Story of Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton. Her first novel for adult readers was Enchanted August; she is now at work on a second. Brenda lives with her family in New York City.

  LIBBA BRAY is the number one New York Times–bestselling author of The Gemma Doyle trilogy (A Great and Terrible Beauty, Rebel Angels, The Sweet Far Thing); the Michael L. Printz Award–winning Going Bovine; Beauty Queens, a Los Angeles Times Book Prize finalist; and the Diviners series. She lives in Brooklyn, New York, and sometimes gets pissed off about stuff. Some of her many role models include Patti Smith, Toni Morrison, Carrie Fisher, Maya Angelou, Gloria Steinem, and Samantha Bee. You can find Libba at www.libbabray.com and on Twitter (@libbabray) and Instagram (libbabray).

  KATIE BUTTON is a Southern chef with a scientific mind who honed her craft in the kitchens of some of the world’s best chefs, most notably Ferran Adrià and José Andrés. She is now the executive chef and co-owner of Cúrate Tapas Bar and Nightbell in Asheville, North Carolina, which have earned worldwide recognition and accolades and Katie a place among Food & Wine’s Best New Chefs in 2015. In October 2016, she released her first cookbook, Cúrate: Authentic Spanish Food from an American Kitchen, offering up recipes for home cooks that celebrate her love of Spain and Southern heritage.

  EMILY CALANDRELLI is the host and a producer of Fox’s Xploration Outer Space, a Saturday morning educational science show. She’s also a correspondent on Bill Nye Saves the World, where she works alongside one of her role models, Bill Nye, to bring their love of science to the public. Emily earned her bachelor’s degree in mechanical and aerospace engineering from West Virginia University and her master’s degree in aeronautics and astronautics as well as technology and policy from Massachusetts Institute of Technology. With her academic background and her passion for science communication, Emily works to inspire others, especially women and minorities, to explore and learn about the world around them.

  BABETTE DAVIS is a self-taught chemist in the ki
tchen, a fitness expert, a motivational speaker, and an owner of the Stuff I Eat restaurant. Born and raised in Los Angeles, she made the conscious decision to eat for the sake of nutrition after being introduced to the vegan lifestyle twenty-five years ago. Her passion lies in inspiring and exposing individuals who otherwise may not be acquainted with a healthier lifestyle because of environmental and economic barriers or the lack of knowledge. Her motto is: “Our journeys are constant and our transitions are infinite; our health is merely a vehicle to enjoy all that’s in between.”

  WILLIABEL JONES DAVIS was born in Fredericksburg, Virginia, to Wilbur and Mary Lillian Wormley Jones. She has two sisters. She earned a BA and MA from Virginia State University and studied French in Paris. In 1972, she wed Ronald W. Davis, and to them Ronald W. Davis II was born in 1984. She was a faculty member at Richard Bland College of the College of William and Mary for thirty-three years and spent twenty years in the US military. A member of many organizations, she has served on several boards and has numerous honors, including army medals.

  MELISSA DE LA CRUZ is the bestselling author of many books for readers of all ages, including the Descendants series, which spent more than a year on the New York Times bestseller list, and The Witches of East End, which became a popular television series that ran for two seasons on the Lifetime Network. She is also the cofounder of Yallwest and the codirector of Yallfest, two of the biggest teen book festivals in the country, and serves on the advisory board of Facing History, which reaches five million schoolchildren nationwide, teaching a curriculum of empathy and social justice.